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Sunday, February 28, 2010

41st NAACP Image Awards



All sisters to the red carpet, please!

Kittens, we've got a lot of work to do so let's get to it.

Amber Riley in Tadashi Shoji Spring 2010


Is it us, or is this a totally different color than the runway version? Because we like the color on the runway version better. We weren't sure we liked this on her at first glance, but the more we look at it, the more we like it.

Anika Noni Rose



Gorgeous and classic. She could have gotten away with a more voluminous do with this dress, but that's about the only complaint we have.

Elise Neal



Gorgeous color. The fit and the drape make her upper half look hot as hell and her lower half look a little busy. We finally came around to pockets on dresses, but you're going to have a hard time convincing us that they're a good idea for gowns.

Eva Marcille



Not loving the hair, but the dress is gorgeous and the makeup is to die.

Gabourey Sidibe



She's the girl of the moment and she's clearly enjoying it, which is endearing as hell. We haven't always liked her red carpet choices, but this is a pretty dress that fits her perfectly.

Gabrielle Union in Pamella Roland Spring 2010


We kind of have a crush on her and are ready to declare her our newest fence-jumper. A fence-jumper is a person who is not of the gender you're normally attracted to whom you nonetheless find insanely attractive, i.e., someone you'd jump the fence for. Like Angelina Jolie for straight women.

Anyway, she looks fabulous. Love the hair.

Jenna Ushkowitz



You'd never know she had that body from watching Glee. The dress isn't exactly earth-shattering but if the goal was to show the world she's sexy and beautiful, mission accomplished.

Jill Scott in Tadashi Shoji Spring 2010


Love the hair, love the dress, but it is just too tight on her. Around the hips and stomach it's fine, but her boobs look like they're screaming in protest.

Keshia Knight Pulliam



We hate her because every time we see her we're reminded of how old we're getting. On the other hand, she looks beautiful here - and tasteful, which is not always something she manages to do. Love the ombre effect on the skirt.

Kimberly Elise



It's a beautiful dress in a beautiful color, but that skirt is awfully flimsy. We guess it's okay to pair a grecian hairstyle to a goddess gown, but it seems a little unimaginative to us. Still, she looks gorge.

Miss Black USA Shayna Rudd



We love that print and we love that she was bold enough to wear it on to the carpet, but the top of that dress is just way too much. It's fighting the bottom. And honey, if the dress is so long that you have to unhook it from your heels while you're getting your picture taken? That means the dress is too long.

Mo'nique in Tadashi Shoji



It's a pretty dress and she looks good, but it's the same effect that happened with Kate Winslet last year. She got nominated for an Oscar and sand blasted all her unique quirkiness away to make herself look like an Oscar nominee.

Mya



There's something endearingly '70s about this look that we kind of love it. It's simple, in a striking color, and it makes her look good. Can't ask for more than that.

Sandra Bullock in Alexander McQueen Resort 2009


She's getting better at doing red carpet. She no longer looks like she'd rather be pulling out tree stumps with her 4x4. Love the dress and mostly love it on her, but we really wish she'd stay away from the clodhopper shoes. She's not petite enough to get away with them in pictures.

Sandra Oh



Another '70s retread. It's beautiful and the color is interesting but it could have used a little embellishment. Also, we're not sold on the way the straps are situated. They're a little wide.

Taraji P. Henson in Hervé L. Leroux



We don't love the hair or the makeup or the jewelry but that dress fits her so spectacularly that it doesn't matter. She looks hot as hell.


[Photos: gettyimages.com/style.com/wireimage.com/tadashicollection.com]

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Ice Princesses: The Costumes, Part 2: The Women

We're looking through the eyes of love, bitches.

We might as well admit this right now: it's way more fun to make fun of the boys. For the most part, their costumes aren't any more cracktastic than the girls', but with the boys you have the extra added delicious flavor of guys twirling around in sparkly costumes, all while desperately afraid to have their masculinity questioned. It's an automatic recipe for hilarity.

With the girls, well, it's all basically ugly little dresses. Still fun, just not as much fun. Now the ice-dancing costumes, THAT'S gonna be a blast.

Short Program


Carolina Kostner of Italy

Oh, GROSS. We can guarantee if we'd gone to high school with this girl we would have hated her. You just know she dots the i in her name with a smiley face.



Cynthia Phaneuf of Canada

Ice Slut.


Elena Glebova of Estonia

GROSS, Part Two. Excessive tweeness makes us bitchy.

Oh, who are we kidding? EVERYTHING makes us bitchy!



Isabelle Pieman of Belgium

All the props in the world for wearing pants. A risky move, because such a display in the world of rigid gender roles that is competitive ice skating is akin to skating out with a big sign on your back that reads "I'M A LESBIAN."

And honey? Rethink the white skates with the black pants.


Jenna McCorkell of Great Britain

We have waited our entire lives to say this sentence:

"Honey, the stripper gloves in your ice-skating costume give you linebacker shoulders."



Kiira Korpi of Finland

This is actually quite pretty.


Kim Yu Na of South Korea

This would make a cute little cocktail dress, provided she wears it without putting her panty hose over her shoes. Off the ice, people look at you funny when you do that.


Ksenia Makarova of Russia

Feh. It's not bad, really. It's just ... pink and purple? That's the best you can do? You look like a 5 year old girl's bedroom (i.e., the bedroom that little gay boys wanted when they were 5, and in some cases we know, 35).



Mao Asada of Japan

We truly live in a multicultural world when Japanese competitors can wear costumes every bit as ugly as their Russian sisters'.


Miki Ando of Japan

What's with the big sparkly cross? Now we wish we'd watched the Olympics. Was it a skating salute to Christ or a skating salute to nuns? Help us out here.


Rachael Flatt of the United States

It's nice to see she's enjoying herself but frankly anyone wearing that outfit in public (let alone in front of millions) should only draw attention to herself if she's really, really drunk or blind, because those are the only two instances anyone would forgive that outfit.


Sarah Hecken of Germany

We applaud her brilliant reconfiguring of an ugly old bridesmaid dress. See? You really CAN take up the hem and wear it again!


Sarah Meier of Switzerland

"SOMEBODY HELP ME! MY TITS ARE ON FIRE!"


Free Skating



Alena Leonova of Russia

"POW!" We adore the Liza-style moves, but that veiny mess of a dress is still fugly, honey.


Anastasia Gimazetdinova of Uzbekistan

You can tell she's still pissed about that shredder accident.


Carolina Kostner of Italy

Why do the women's costumes all do weird things around the boobs? Why can't the men's costumes do the same thing with the ass area? That would be an instance where we could get behind illusion netting.


Cynthia Phaneuf of Canada

Apparently Canada is where Cher's old costumes go to die. Who knew?


Elena Glebova of Estonia

Honey, no one wants to see your latest MRI results.



Kiira Korpi of Finland

"Okay, I'll do my routine, but then I have to get right back to the office to finish filing those reports."



Ksenia Makarova of Russia

See? Weird boobs. What's that all about?


Miki Ando of Japan

It's a little-known fact that the ancient Egyptians invented illusion netting.

They did not, however, perfect the nipple shield.


Sarah Hecken of Germany

Okay, it looks a little like a vinyl tablecloth we saw in Target yesterday and we will never, ever be fans of illusion netting, but this has a bit of style to it.


Sarah Meier of Switzerland


Oh geez, honey. If you're gonna go that route, why not have a big cake wheeled out on to the ice so you can pop out of it?